Good but not Great

It took Sam about one week to recoup from Croup, at least to the point where he would not be wheezing, and then it was back to day care for him since mommy and daddy could not keep taking off work if he wasn't really struggling. Unfortunately part of day care is getting sick and my child still is not well. See how disgusted he is! Sam had a fever 95% of the days that he was home sick and when he was a day care. When I noticed that his fever would spike, unless we gave him Tylenol or Motrin around the clock, I knew it was time to take the kid back into the doctor's office again. Sam and I spent 4 and a half hours at the hospital last Friday while I had to watch my son in misery through his chest x-rays, blood draw, and examination. He did not feel good and it was easy to tell. His eyes weren't filled with happiness, but a look of grogginess and sheer sickness. His eyes are red and watery, his nose a leaky faucet or stopped up to the point where he would be forced to breath out of his mouth, and a cough so bad it gags him from time to time. Being that Sam is my first child I am dealing quite well, but have times of feeling helpless to my son and having minor breakdowns because I would gladly go through the sickness for him if I could. Day care is not a place for the weak, and after this roller coaster of sickness Samuel will be strong. Building up immunities is something we all must go through, but it is much easier when your child can speak to you telling you what ales them. Sam is getting better but far from great.



On a much lighter note Samuel crawled his first two steps a couple of days ago, but has concluded for the time being that "army crawling" gets him around just fine. He is also pulling himself up to his knees from the ground, and will soon be trying to escape the confines of his crib when he isn't sleepy. Needless to say, tonight a disassembling of his crib will be taking place to lower his mattress so we don't find our son on the floor in the morning. As suggested by Baby Center (wonderful web site) once a baby starts to pull himself up bumpers must be removed to not aide in a boost over the crib side. With each passing day I can tell that he really knows who is mama and daddy are. This is a feeling that brings me much happiness to know that when Sam wants me, he will army crawl over to me, or he wants Joel the same. He is so ecstatic when I pick him up from day care he immediately starts to fuss and reach for me, and when he is in the comfort of Mommy's arms, all is well in the world again. I'm not sure of a more greater feeling in the world. It almost seems impossible that my time in the Navy is coming to a quick end and I will be able to have our baby all to myself all day, to learn and grow together. I look forward to what the future might bring, and hopefully we will be blessed with happier moments then sad; but when the difficult times arrive, at least we will have the company of our newly beginning family.

"Croup"ed Out

Yes it is true. Our little man has Croup for the past 4 days, and I would not wish that on any body's child! Samuel could barely breath and would panic many times throughout the day to send him sobbing for some sort of reassurance that he would be okay. I give all the credit to his Montessori school. Our pediatrician said that Croup is usually passed through other children and due to the lack of him being around other children until now, that is my hypothesis. Our bed has been the recliner in order to keep Sam in a reclined position to make breathing for him easier, giving him his medication around the clock, and closely listening for any change in his struggle for breaths. This all started out as an innocent cold just after his counterpart Norman had the sniffles; and concluded that it was mere coincidence that Sam was sick days after Normy was, considering he hadn't been around him for a week after I read the report on Becca's blog. Not much later I knew that he was much sicker than anticipated.

His poor little voice is barely noticeable with weak interrupted "crying" sounds, fever,
and labored breaths are all apart of this dreadful experience. Until now I have been blessed to not know the toll Sam being sick would take on me. Hours at a time in the wee hours of the night, I would watch him sleep and closely listen for any signs of respiratory distress, so I could react in a timely manner to get him to the emergency room. With the medications we have to give Sam it was also recommended to us that we let him breath in the cold air outside,
which is supposed to sooth his vocal cords; and then do a steam shower at night to help break up the gunk in his chest. With everything going on I am emotionally drained, although I have tried extremely hard to keep composure, and physically drained from my sleepless night and short sobbing moments of feeling absolutely helpless to my son. The important thing is my baby is taken care of. I took Tuesday and Wednesday off of work and Daddy assumed duty Thursday, and I will again assume duty for Friday. With any luck Samuel will be doing much better by the weekend and we can get some much needed R&R in! Although Sam is down for the count, he certainly isn't out! Here you might be able to see some of his discomfort and because he is such a good boy he even stopped to smile for me later that day.



I also will now put more emphasis on cleanliness with our son. Toys will be sprayed with Lysol on a nightly basis and there is no playing with noticeable soiled objects (which I tried very hard to avoid in the first place) but I will be even better than before. Shoes will be removed EVERY TIME we come in the house so that the chemicals from the road, and just the nasty stuff in general we walk on, will not be tracked onto the carpet our son loves rolling around on. Hopefully his immune system will be hard charging for the next time an invasive virus chooses to use our son as its host.

Many Firsts

I can't believe how big my little boy looks sitting up in Great Grandpa Ledom's barber chair! Didn't cry one drop, but loved Grandpa brushing off his neck, and giving his look of approval while Grandpa styles his hair just right. The most he tried to do was look and see what the heck that buzzing thing was, and why exactly Great Grandpa was bringing it closer to his head.

Today at the doctor's office I really found out what a big boy Samuel is becoming. He now weighs in at 18 lbs and 9 oz, and is 28 1/2" long. Whoo Weee. Some of his newest tricks are reaching for me, getting up on all fours and rocking (trying to get a taste of sweet carpet cruising victory), and when I fake cry giving his mommy love by laying his head down on mine. Daddy is a little heart broken that when he tries to do this trick Sam just stares then gives a great big smile. The saddest part of our break ending is having to put Sam in day care, and well I like to think that putting him into a Montessori school is a better choice. Sam is surely to only benefit from this experience and will make him a more well rounded infant (if that's possible for babies). With Sam becoming a big boy he has outgrown many outfits and many toys. The Bumbo chair only irritates him, his swing doesn't offer the thrill it once did, and here shortly I believe his coveted JumpeRoo will also be put away. He now loves his free sitting Independence from his new "low chair" yes "low chair" not "high chair." His new chair from Grandma keeps the one bedroom apartment less crowded and the chance to have Sam sit where ever we are sitting.
Here I tried to get a shot of Sam admiring himself in the new monkey mirror that his Auntie Jen gave him for Christmas, but this is the best that I could come up with. Sorry! It is amazing that once you are a parent the amount of different emotions you have to go through. I am thrilled that he is learning new tricks and is becoming independent, but also heart broken that a little bit each day he is preparing to leave me to find out who he really is, and what he is all about. I smile, yet tears well up in my eyes at the exact same time...who would of thunk? My days are all melded together and I try desperately to capture all the memories on my camera or camcorder, yet I know so many more are slipping right through my fingers. These pictures are my attempts to freeze time. Moments that I can always go back to, to remember his sweet little voice, his excitement in his JumpeRoo, and our relaxing bath times. I can't stop time, but I'll cling to these fond memories and close my eyes; then for maybe an instant I can hold my little boy once more.

New Year's Resolution

My goodness it really has been, what seems, decades since my last posting. I have been refreshed and am ready to keep up with this blogland more often. It is hard for me to recall what my last post was and I think I left off with Sam's first snow...we'll pick up from there. Joel and I were fortunate enough to be afforded an eleven day stay back in our hometown of Olathe, Kansas. That has been our longest gaunt back to the Midwest since I joined the Navy almost four and a half years ago; and although it was the longest, it seemed just like our shortest previous trips. When you don't live in the same state with most of your family it seems like everyday is filled with something to do, or people to see, which is fun and great company, but wouldn't it be great just to be able to sit and not worry about what you are going to be doing the following day? That is what inevitably makes the time go by so dang fast no matter how many days you visit. All and all we had a lovely time, and were spoiled to the point that there were only a few straggling items left on our Christmas wish lists. Samuel was bombarded with mounds of adorable new outfits, toys that light up, play music, talk to you, shoot balls in the air, and the all time classics of the plastic giant beads, and wooden blocks. Needless to say, we are going to be forced to be members of a Sam's club or a Cosco, just so we can buy batteries in bulk to keep up with the ever evolving electronic toys that has our son expressing his approval through a multitude of "oooo's." And I will have to leave you with that for tonight because there is so much more to write about but I will post the Christmas photos and will continue with the story tomorrow night.