I love Samuel so much it's just so weird to think how my love will be matched with a second child -yes- Joel and I have been blessed with another child. We were trying to have another one before we even moved back to Kansas but it just wasn't happening and I was finding myself getting discouraged. I knew however that God would give us another miracle when the time was right; and I guess May was the right time. We found out the beginning part of May that we would be having another baby; but were trying to keep it to ourselves until I could make my first appointment. When I found out the doctor couldn't get me in until July 2 I knew this big secret couldn't be kept for that long. Joel caved and let me spill the beans.
For a while I always thought that it would be nice to have another boy right away so Sam would have another brother to play with, but I have recently been more in tuned to how many males are in our home. Even the pets are male in which I have decided I would love the second child to be a girl, and if not then hopefully my sex of choice will come around later.
This time around my hormones have been playing horrible tricks on me. I have been in a clouded funk for almost 3 weeks now. I haven't wanted to get out of my pajamas, do any house wife duties, leave the house, or keep up with my school work; all I've wanted to do is sit and lounge around with Sam. Now that I feel my spirits lifting I have so much catching up to do. I have started cleaning room by room and knocking off homework assignments that I have let go for the past week and I plan on getting some fresh air moving through my lungs.
It is so hard to think about anyone other than Sam being my baby and someone else to love just as much as he. Some how I know that it will all come together for me, because although they will both be my babies they each are their own person. Joel thinks that with every child you have they get uglier, which I hope isn't the case, but Samuel sure has set a high standard! This baby will be due the mid part of January and all I can think about is how huge I'll be at Christmas. Someone told me today that my situation is perfect because the holiday food will taste so much better being pregnant than if I were not. Here's hoping to good tasting food and expanding our family one baby at a time.